Jeremy L. Berg

¹⁸ Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go” (John 21:18). 

Peter strikes me as what we sometimes call “a man’s man.” A man of action. Driven. Ambitious. Practical and results-oriented. He’s a “git-r-done’ dude and that personality would prove to be both an asset and liability in his spiritual growth.

Jesus’ last words to Peter, hinting at his future martyrdom, capture this struggle. Behind Jesus’ words lie a deeper lesson, something like: “There was a time when you called the shots, worked hard to control outcomes, and thought your deeds and moral performance were what counted most with God. But spiritual maturity is not so much about how much you can do for God and “accomplish” for the Kingdom, but letting go of the need to be in control and learning to live in a peaceful surrender to God’s abiding presence and power.”

How much is our faith and our church’s effectiveness measured by what we DO? How many programs we offer? How many service projects and missions trips we do? How often we attend church? How often we read our Bibles? How often we pray? How much money we give? Do, do, do.

We need to balance what WE DO with Mary’s wisdom at the Annunciation of, “LET IT BE DONE UNTO ME” (Luke 1:38). If God is the true Sculptor and we are the clay, then we need to sit still on God’s workbench more often so he can do his job. Imagine old Geppetto trying to put the finishing touches on his masterpiece Pinocchio if he were already a living boy, jumping up and down and running around the room. That’s much of American Christian spirituality. We’re working too hard for God to work on us. We’re moving too fast for God to move in us.

How many pastors and church leader annual performance reviews are focused on performance rather than inner life growth? Do we value and promote leaders who spend hours “on the clock” in quiet meditation and study, taking long prayerful walks with God in the woods, reading and reflecting on the Scriptures, and passing that wisdom on to others in small and invisible ways? Or do we tend to value and promote leaders who launch initiatives, develop programs, prepare great sermons, grow the organization and meet the bottom line?

Peter was a man of action. He pledged to work hard as Jesus’ right hand man, to protect him and stand by him. He signed up to help Jesus expand his ministry, amplify his message, further his reach and he likely had an ambitious timeline for doing it. In the end, Peter’s action-oriented faith crashed up against his own human frailty. He didn’t get the job done. He dropped the ball. Instead of standing by Jesus, he denied him three times. He failed his quarterly performance review. In John 21, Peter gets summoned to a meeting with the Boss. Would Jesus fire him on the spot for his poor performance?

The world values confident leaders who appear self-sufficient and keep their cracks well hidden under their cloak of past successes. Jesus is looking for leaders who are in touch with their weaknesses and open about their dependence on God. Put biblically, “Man looks at outward appearances, but God looks at the heart” (1 Sam 16:7). The world urges you to “make something of yourself”, while spiritual wisdom invites you to “make less of yourself, and more of God.” Put biblically, “He [Christ] must increase [in my life], and I [my ego] must decrease” (John 3:30).

Back on the shore in John 21 (see previous post), Peter’s failure in denying Jesus three times had him doubting his “abilities” (note the focus again on “doing”) and feeling disqualified for leadership. Jesus prepares him a meal on the beach at the Table of Forgiveness and then teaches Peter (and all of us) a valuable lesson on what is required for leadership in his Kingdom. Consider it Peter’s job interview for service in God’s work in the world.

What’s the one question Jesus will ask the interviewee? What’s the main requirement for getting hired or remaining employed in the Kingdom?

Jesus asks Simon Peter just one question, three times over, and that question is not: Are you a hard worker? Do you have good people skills? Can you preach good sermons? Can you quote Scripture well? Do you spend a daily quiet time with God in the Bible and prayer? Do you volunteer at the Food Shelf? Do you attend church regularly? Do you have a seminary degree? Without diminishing the importance of any of these, look what Jesus wants from Peter:

¹⁵ Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?”

“Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”

¹⁶ Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”

He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.”

¹⁷ The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”

Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep. 

Friends, the hardest work some of you will ever do as an ambitious, dutiful, enterprising Christian may be to stop doing so much for Jesus. You’ve spent your first half of life with youthful vigor learning to “dress yourself” and “going where you want to go” and being patted on the back for what you have accomplished for yourself and perhaps God. The Second Half of Life is about learning how to let go of control, allowing God to “dress you” and the Holy Spirit to lead you places you don’t want to go (e.g., counseling, rehab, illness) that may be painful but will lead to inner growth.

While we work hard to bring God to different parts of our world, God’s working hard to get into our soul and begin working on our hearts. We want to “move mountains for God”, while God wants to help us still and hear his quiet voice. We want to “gain the whole world” for God’s glory, while God wants us to stop forfeiting the health of our soul in the name of “ministry” (Matt 16:26). Some of the hardest working people you meet in the workplace are the laziest when it comes to the hard work of spiritual growth. Underneath the big house, big bank account, big muscles, big social media presence, big smile or big personality often lies a tiny, neglected, and underdeveloped soul.

Jesus has the gall to get in our face, confront our “front”, and asks, “What are you willing to give in exchange of your soul” (Mark 8:38)?

I write as a recovering spiritual workaholic for God–not in the sense of working too many hours or putting work ahead of family. Rather, as one confessing how badly I often want God and others to be pleased with my “output” and efforts. I often crave the words “Well done, good and faithful servant ” more than I ponder and heed Jesus’ main question, “Jeremy, son of Curt and Eileen, do you love me?” It’s hard work for many of us to just be loved for nothing we’ve done, but just for who we are: God’s beloved.

All this time, I thought God wanted me to be getting things done for Him, when he mainly wants me to stop, drop and roll into His presence and learn to be loved and to love Him with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. I so badly want to be “used by God”, while God so badly wants me to be just be loved.

So, friends, let Jesus’ words lighten your load today just as they lightened Peter’s back then. Stop doing and “let it be done unto you” today. If you simply love Jesus, that is enough. It really is. Sit still, Pinocchio, and let the Good Artisan “carry on to completion the good work He began in you” (Phil 1:6).